Live Your Best Life (because mine just started) (джен)

“Need a hand, Lieutenant?”
Hank felt his brain screech to a resounding halt. He did not know how to feel. He did not know how to react. Should he focus on the fact that his partner had hurled his own severed arm at the perp that just a few moments ago was holding Hank at gunpoint? Or should he worry about the shittastic piece of garbage of a pun he just dropped, all the while smiling his doofy ‘did I do a good, Hank??’ smile and leaking blue blood from his shoulder like a demented blue-raspberry icee machine.
“I was attempting to use clever wordplay to encourage a humorous response. Did I utilize it correctly, Lieutenant?”